Episode 17: Sharon Martin, LCSW, on Co-dependence

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Codependence, Perfectionism & Anxiety

Always focusing on others can add to your anxiety. In this episode of Woman Worriers, creator and host Elizabeth Cush and her guest, Sharon Martin, LCSW, talk about the relationship between codependence, people-pleasing, perfectionism and anxiety.

We all have a lot more choices than we think we do.
— Sharon Martin, LCSW

What do you want for dinner? If you can’t answer that question without first thinking about your partner’s or your children’s favorite foods, then you need to listen to this episode of the Woman Worriers podcast. Creator and host Elizabeth Cush, of Progression Counseling in Annapolis, Md., and Sharon Martin, a San Francisco Bay-area counselor and author of the Happily Imperfect blog, talk about codependence and its costs — including how constantly worrying about others can cause you to lose your sense of self. They also talk about what’s necessary to move past codependency and offer tips to help you get there.

Listen and learn:

  • How our childhood family dynamic shaped our personalities — and our personal struggles — why leaving the childhood home isn’t enough
  • How codependency serves as a coping mechanism
  • What happens when coping skills to deal with chaos are no longer useful
  • Why emotional safety is the Holy Grail of codependency
  • How the drive toward self-preservation protects — and causes its own set of problems
  • Why being codependent sometimes feels so good (for a while)
  • How society sets up women to be codependent
  • How people-pleasing fuels resentment — and what happens when you ignore your negative feelings
  • Why learning to set boundaries is so important — and so difficult
  • Why setting double standards for expectations of yourself and others sets you up for unhappiness
  • Why “How do I feel?” is a critical question
  • The communication skills you need to practice to regain balance in your life
  • The shift in perspective that can make it easier to set healthy boundaries
  • Why what you’re having for dinner matters
  • How meditation can help

Learn More

> Sharon Martin’s website

> Happily Imperfect blog

> Codependent No More by Melody Beattie

> Calm meditation & breathing apps

> Progression Counseling

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