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Talia Bombola on Assertiveness
Do you sometimes have trouble speaking up for yourself? Then listen in on this week’s episode of Woman Worriers as host Elizabeth Cush and Talia Bombola, known as The Confidence Coach, talk about how women can learn to be more assertive.
“When we start to learn to be more effective in our communication, that’s where our assertiveness comes in.”
Show Notes:
Too often women feel frustrated, angry, unseen or unheard. We struggle with getting our needs met because we don’t ask, or we ask in ways that say maybe we don’t really mean it. This week, Woman Worriers podcast host Elizabeth Cush, LCPC, a licensed professional therapist and founder of Progression Counseling in Annapolis, Md., welcomes Talia Bombola, LMFT, a California-based therapist and life coach who helps women and teens gain confidence and increase assertiveness. They talk about how therapy made a difference in their lives at an early age and offer insights into how we sabotage our own attempts to speak up and why assertiveness can be especially challenging for women. They also share concrete tips for communicating our needs and wants effectively in a way that makes it easier to set healthy boundaries, negotiate with others and gain more confidence and self-compassion.
Listen and learn:
The misconception about therapy that might be keeping many people from living their best lives
Why it can be more effective to get into therapy before you think you need it
How to know when you should reach out for help
Why assertiveness and setting boundaries are usually harder for women
The two very different types of people who can benefit from learning how to be more assertive
How—and why—learning dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) skills can benefit teens—and help their parents, too
The impact of a changing culture on women’s assertiveness
The small verbal and written habits we have that might be sabotaging our ability to get what we need
Why we should worry less about the “B” word
What setting boundaries is really all about
How to negotiate for what you need without getting into a fight
The important connection between clear communication and assertiveness
What to ask yourself when you’re afraid to speak up for yourself
Why timing matters
How practicing self compassion can help with confidence
Which books and workbooks can help you get more insight into the skills that can help you to be more assertive, set healthy boundaries and negotiate for what you need
Learn More:
> Talia Bombola’s coaching website
> Talia Bombola’s therapy website
> Therapy With Talia on Instagram
> It’s Complicated: The Couples Guide Podcast
> Between 2 Clinicians podcast
> The Assertiveness Guide for Women: How to Communicate Your Needs, Set Healthy Boundaries, and Transform Your Relationships by Julie de Azevedo Hanks, PhD
> Relationship Breakthrough: How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life by Cloé Madanes
> Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Kristin Neff, PhD
> The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook: A Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength, and Thrive by Kristin Neff, PhD, and Christopher Germer, PhD
> The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotional Regulation & Distress Tolerance, Emotional Regulation & Distress Tolerance by Matthew McKay, PhD, Jeffrey C. Wood, PsyD, and Jeffrey Brantley, MD
> Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life by Marshall B, Rosenberg, PhD
> Sign up for Elizabeth’s newsletter
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